On Being Single: Via Email

My hilarious friend, Melissa, sends around emails that get me laughing out loud … literally. Here’s an example of one she sent last night.

From: Melissa K
Subject: Melissa’s Thoughts…
Date: October 4, 2006 10:07:15 PM CDT

Top 10 Reasons Why I’m Single:

10. I enjoy looking in the mirror and repeating Nishnabatna.

9. Saturday night is not complete without a trip to Long John Silvers.

8. I’m obsessed with mail. I like holding it, touching it, bathing it, clipping it.

7. I only like notebooks that open from the side. Legal pads drive me crazy.

6. I’ve declared my intentions of being cast as a young Connie Sellecca in any movie. Any.

5. I continually try to cure myself of my lactose intollerance. No luck…yet.

4. Yes, my toes always look like scrunched hammers.

3. I still have an insationable desire to play hide-and-go-seek at night.

2. I once spent an entire conversation with a boy not pay any attention to what he said. Instead, I focused on how I could cross my legs under the table without being in pain.

1. I only drink Gatorade on game days.

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